The Ex Who Won't Go Away Welcome to America's most dramatic reality show: "The Energy Bachelor!" Watch as our contestant, Donald Trump, tries to rekindle his passionate romance with his old flame, Fossil Fuels, while ghosting his recent green energy matches from the dating app "Carbon-Free Cupid." America's Energy Dating Game: A Love Story Gone Nuclear "Oil and gas are my soulmates," Trump was heard saying at a campaign rally. "We had such beautiful times together during my first term. Such tremendous chemistry. Nobody understands chemistry better than me, believe me!" The Paris Agreement: It's Not You, It's Me (Actually, It's Definitely You) Remember when America broke up with the Paris Agreement? Well, get ready for Season 2 of "International Breakup Drama." It's like that friend who keeps getting back together with their ex only to break up again. At this point, the Paris Agreement should just chan...